oonegative posted a detailed photo journey of his SNES’s transformation from ol yeller’ to a console you could eat off of (not recommended). If you have the same issue with your beloved childhood console, or perhaps found a cheap but ugly replacement, you might find this useful.

Oh boy, did this SNES smoke? The bottom half seems to have retained some kind of virginal whiteness, but that only exacerbates the grotesque disfigurement up top. And what’s with the loader slot looking so pristine? All I can say is “you got a purty mouth”.

 

 

Here’s an aerial view, or what it would look like if our world was as 2D as most SNES games were. No Mode 7 camera angles here.

If these are the window to the soul, then I don’t want to know what deal with the devil this console did to deserve such a fate. Alas, it’s not the console or any thing’s fault for aging, for that is the cruel game time plays on us all.

oonegative not only showed off the beautiful transformation, but included these handy how-to photos in the gallery as well. Grind up 40 blonde people and put them in a bottle, very interesting.

Wrap it in a SNES shaped condom (looks used judging by the wrinkles) and shine a creepy black light to make sure your mean older brother didn’t do anything…………….intimate to it. Maybe older bro was playing this game?

There are no written instructions but I’d assume you can take the condom off when it looks like this.

Wow, I feel better too and I’m just looking at a picture. Is this what art does to people of the learned variety?

I would kiss that, but I wouldn’t because I wouldn’t want my dirty mouth contaminating this glorious virgin SNES. She may not be mini or have HDMI, but this is the true classic, and has the controller cord length to prove it. Long live the Super Nintendo Entertainment System.

Here’s the full gallery from oonegative below.